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[01 Jan 2008|02:52am] |
So Ive had this livejournal for two years now I think with this new year it is time I get a new one so everyone add my new livejournal
[Click here!]
add it!
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[29 Dec 2007|02:21am] |
Today Eian William James Nelson-Perez was born. He is the cutest baby ever. Deborah's baby was suppose to be due in February. So we did not think it would come this early. I was so happy I got to be there. Here are the pictures I took.
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[23 Dec 2007|02:32pm] |
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Christmas is almost here and I am just looking forward to snow witch wont happen here. I just wish I could talk to someone who would lay in the grass with me and look at the sky and asking me, "Are you Ok?" I just want to take a deep breath and than let it all out. You will feel it. It will be that wind blowing away your hair. .I'm pretty sure the whole world is in on this inside joke that I'm not aware of.
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[11 Dec 2007|06:49pm] |
I love this book and I can totally relate
"I just wish that God or my parents or Sam or my sister or someone would just tell me what's wrong with me. Just tell me how to be different in a way that makes sense. To make this all go away. And disappear. I know that's wrong because it's my responsibility, and I know that things get worse before they get better because that's what my psychiatrist says, but this is a worse that feels too big."
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[08 Dec 2007|03:04am] |
If you were the topic on JeopardyI would have said"who's the queen of insanity?"you were showing me all your new tatoos
you're scaring the sleeping owls
you're laying your hands on that vowl
spinning the wheel of fortune
jeopardizing the fortune
And who wants to be a millionaire
if one could only have a night with thee
a million swallows fill the air
as we're playing Monopoly
I tricked you into playing Chess
just to study your strategy
It turns out your inside's a mess
and your life has been a tragedy
but you're playing the right cards
jacks, jokers and hearts
If you were the topic on Jeopardy
I would have said
"I know him I can't knock him"
he says jippy-caj-ej,
he's the guy who comes with suggestions
and your answer should have been a question
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[01 Dec 2007|02:53pm] |
Things have been going pretty well lately. I guess I’m sort of waiting for the axe to fall.
Sometimes I think I take myself too seriously, and that Jei helps me understand life’s a joke.
Supposed to be fun.
I’m so glad I got my act together.
I would be nowhere without some of the people I have.
Do you ever have one of those moments where you look back to a crossroads you faced months previously and feel a wash of relief knowing you made the right choice?
I’ve spent most of my life looking back, wondering what would have happened had I went down that other road, and sometimes even looking back knowing I made the wrong choice, it’s so nice to be looking back proud.
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[27 Nov 2007|01:23pm] |
Flights are booked!
Lauren is coming down today, then we are hopefully flying back with her to portland for holidays and soon after I arrive home the only problem is I’m SO poor! Once the holiday trips are over NO more spending on clothes, jewellery, shoes, cosmetics, perfume, cinema tickets, meals, or coffee whenever I feel like it. Which is often. I’m going to hide an envelope in my drawer titled “HOLIDAY MONEY – DO NOT TOUCH” and keep adding to it.
Lauren and I are gonna have the greatest time like always
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[19 Nov 2007|12:07am] |
I have decided to clean everything out in my life so here are a few things i need to do.
1. My room
My room is the worst. I never throw anything away and now I have to chuck out what feels like half my life, I don't know why I would ever need some of the things i have ever again, but I don't want to throw it away! Come on. It's like an... antique! 100 years from now, my grandchildren will gaze upon it and say to their children, "Look how your Great Grandma was at everything!!"
2. My friends
I really need to call people there's someone I need to call, I can't remember who it is
Maybe there's more than one, all I know is that I disappear too much. Sometimes I wonder where I go, too
People keep asking me questions, I don't have the answers, I'm very sorry really.
3. School
School I have so much catching up to do with school I am almost on the right track. I am switching out of options soon. A real school soon. I am doing very well I need to practice my hand writing. Ann says it is horrible. And I know she is right. Its only a matter of time. I need to start saying no to people and doing my work like I should be doing and that will happen.
4. Computer
Housing 30,000+++ MP3s, 100+ concert/gig video clips, useless pictures sputtering machine of this trash, or transfer some to an external hard drive.
5. MySpace
I do this every single time. When I get sick of scanning each friend request individually to see if I know the person trying to add me, I just accept everyone till I realise that I don't want to be a idiot with 500 MySpace friends. Then, it takes me a week to go through everyone on my friends list to see who the randoms are, and kick them off. In my ideal universe, everyone's profile name would be their real name because really, when your profile picture is a blurry mess, and your name reads: "Party On Wayne!" or "The Cartographer", I have no idea who you are, which means I actually have to go to your profile, read it, look at all your pictures, and figure out if I've ever seen you in my life. Which wastes time. Which makes me want to throw my shoe at the computer screen and give up after going through 10 people, out of the hundreds I hope to delete. Then there are all the people the ones I met once or twice, and who proceeded to add me on MySpace. Only I can't quite remember them anymore, but fear offending them by deleting them. I worry too much about the feelings of others. I should just delete every last random who makes life difficult by using obscure photographs, names that make no sense or whom I'm not sure I've ever clapped eyes upon. Ideally, I would like less than 100 people on my friends list... Not sure if I'll get there, but this is a worthy goal.
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[11 Nov 2007|11:10pm] |
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mood |
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 disappointed |
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It's funny how you think you know someone so well. But then you find out your completely wrong.
I'm done with it all
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[04 Nov 2007|09:50pm] |
oh and Halloween Party pictures!
Aww joey and ashely are engaged fun night!
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[02 Nov 2007|01:01pm] |
I cried and
I cried
until I had no breath
it’s funny
how when I cry from a sneeze
the tear comes from my
left eye and
when I cry from the heart
it comes from my
right eye.
“story of my life”.
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[01 Nov 2007|08:29pm] |
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a good friend recently said....."you either need to be delusional or depressed." truer words have never been spoken.
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[10 Oct 2007|03:23pm] |
The best advice I've ever gotten was from my instructor who said, the key to perfection is to "be an introvert". Avoid the overwhelming urge to compare what you're doing to that of other people. So difficult, yet so critical.
Be an introvert.
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[29 Sep 2007|12:57pm] |
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I know exactly what I'm going to be this year. Or should I say whom? Oh, it shall be outrageous, truly, outrageous! And it's a lot... of pink.
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[25 Sep 2007|01:56pm] |
My life should really be a book. I have the greatest people in my life. I wouldn't trade them for anything. It never fails when I am down something amazing happens and it turns out I was sad for no reason. today i was wondering alot. and wandering alot. i looked at all the people and thought of all the people they had looked at today and i felt so incredibly common, because of all the people who have looked at me before. it's like the great feeling i get from snowflakes on my tongue when i am alone, because i witnessed and felt it and that's that.
i thought about the way people perceive themselves and i felt okay with myself for the first time in a long time even though people made me feel so very ugly today. like when my eye contact is rejected and it's like they sapped any energy out through my irises.
and then i sat and thought a little about what is so great about my friends and it made my heart clench and how it is okay that people i value aren't perfect and rarely near to understanding what i mean and how i cry too much even though it is less than ever before and how maybe that's okay sometimes. i thought about how it feels to be needed. and then i thought about how other people might feel about that and whether they'd understand what i meant if i tried to explain.
and if it matters if they don't. and I figured out I have everything I need and I am thankful
Today is lovely
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[21 Sep 2007|12:55am] |
that means no
where I come from.
i am cold, out waiting for the day to come.
i chew my lips, and I scratch my nose;
it feels so good to be a rose.
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[16 Sep 2007|11:24pm] |
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Sometimes a boy sends me one of those flower-icons on aim and I told him once "I bet you do that to all the girls" and he replied by sending me a gaping pike-head. And they say girls are the ones tough to understand. Sometimes it bugs me how easily many of us girls are charmed, including me, all the boys need to do is type (F) on the computer and we're instantly happier and like them more. Hah! We're such losers. God knows at least I am. I'm done "talking" to boys on the internet
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[04 Sep 2007|08:52pm] |
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The past few months have been perfect.The only thing is the people around my life everyone seems so sad for some reason so I get stuck dealing with their problem witch is fine because I love comforting people and making people smile it is just sad that everyone in my life is not doing great and I want them to! Sometimes I am at the mouth of the town. and sometimes it will swallow you whole and now you're in the belly. I really have been following my instincts, witch have lead me in the right direction I don't know why I have started to now. sometimes i encounter people, some of them will remain in my life for an extended time, some of them for only a moment, and have a deep, deep appreciation for them. they are the reason i get out of bed, to know that what they are is possible (love type one) i want to become them and give myself away and make other people happy (love type two)
Life is lovely
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[03 Sep 2007|11:48pm] |
I don't want to be seen as a pretty thing
'Cause it's the pretty things that we're always breaking.
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[18 Aug 2007|02:41pm] |
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For the first time in my life I actually get what they say about me
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uneamour's journal
